Happy to bring you a little wellness for your Wednesday—and that’s a good thing!

It’s All is Calm…ish promo season! 🎉 I just got back from Nashville after a whirlwind week of podcast tapings and speaking at the Raising Boys and Girls Capable Kids Conference. Over the next few weeks, I’ll be sharing insights from the incredible speakers who took the stage—and today, I’ll kick things off with a few from my own talk.

Here’s the thing: even after 20+ years as a therapist and 19 years of parenting, I still walked away with new takeaways. Parenting truly is a lifelong masterclass—because as your kids grow, you’ve got to keep growing right along with them.

Boredom 101

I was asked, “What’s the one skill you want all parents and kids to have for their wellness?’ My answer: The ability to be bored.  

But why, you ask? I’ll tell you:

The truth is, we no longer can tolerate being bored—thanks to that little device that puts the entire world at our fingertips. When we don’t allow ourselves moments of boredom, we lose access to what psychologists call “soft fascination”—those effortless, restorative moments when our minds wander without having to focus on anything in particular.

Soft fascination is about gently engaging your attention with your surroundings—daydreaming, taking a mindful walk, watching clouds drift by, or observing the waves roll in. It’s the practice of being fully present in a moment while letting your mind rest in the beauty of the environment around you.

What’s amazing is that even when we’re not working hard in those moments, the brain is—just in a different way. During moments of soft fascination, a network of neurons in the brain called the DMN (default mode network—I know so creative) takes over. 

Here’s what happens when it does: 

1. Introspection and self-reflection. 

2. Social cognition—how we understand others, read social cues, develop empathy.

3. Expansive and creative thinking—why do you think your best ideas happen in long showers? 

4. Emotion regulation—anyone feeling Calm..ish? 

5. Future thinking and planning. 

Lastly, when the DMN is not employed enough, there is a higher risk of developing both neurological and psychiatric illnesses.  

So give boredom a shot this week! 

Sleep for Beauty and Brains

A new Mayo Clinic study found that chronic sleep deprivation (struggling to sleep 3 or more nights a week) speeds up the decline in memory and thinking skills—and can raise dementia risk by 40%. Essentially, lack of sleep ages the brain. 

I cannot stress this enough: sleep is critical, especially in midlife. As I shared this weekend, if you’re over 50 and averaging fewer than 5 hours of sleep a night, your risk of a cardiac event rises significantly.

For more on sleep, I highly recommend Mathew Walker’s Why We Sleep.

Pre-order Bonuses are here! 

Lastly, I know this was a particularly hard week for our nation. As heavy as it was, I choose to focus on the many people of differing viewpoints who come together to oppose violence. And with that, I ask you to be kind to yourself—be bored a little more, sleep a little more. It will make a difference in managing all of it. 

Wishing you every good thing this week.

Why 3 Good Things?

Wellness isn’t one big thing—it’s three good things, or two good things, or five. It’s noticing the gifts of the life we have.

If you’ve followed me for a while, you’ve probably heard me talk about “3 Good Things.” It’s the question I often ask my kids and one of my favorite gratitude practices.

Research shows that identifying three good things each day can actually rewire your brain from negativity to optimism in just 30 days. Follow along for my 3GT each week! And send me yours! I want to hear from you.