Well, summer is officially here! It brings longer days and balmy, star-filled nights, fun gatherings with friends—and sometimes a little too much family time with a lot less structure. It can be wonderful and stressful all at once—and for that reason, a good time to make time for your own wellness. 

If you’re a new subscriber, welcome to 3GT! Each week in this newsletter, I’ll share 3 Good Things in wellness that I experienced and that I hope will support your own mental, emotional, and physical well-being.

The Spicy Margarita and the Science of Connection (FFE- Female Friendship Effect)

Last night, I finally had dinner—and a long-awaited spicy margarita—with two of my high school girlfriends. We've known each other for 35 years (how is that possible?!), and one even flew in from Colorado. There's a kind of connection that happens when you're with people who knew you before you really knew yourself—and we felt it. We could’ve talked for days. There was a peace, a joy, a rightness in just being together.

But here’s what’s fascinating: there’s actual science behind those feel-good vibes.

Research out of UCLA shows that time spent with close friends—especially for women—lowers cortisol (the stress hormone) and boosts oxytocin (our love and connection hormone). It’s what scientists call “the female friendship effect.”

And in midlife, when estrogen levels drop (and with it, serotonin), these moments matter more than ever. Estrogen plays a key role in mood regulation, so as it declines, we need to lean into the things that naturally lift us. Good friendships aren't just good for the soul—they're essential for our well-being.

So if you needed a reason to grab lunch with a friend or send that “let’s catch up” text, this is it. Reach out to that friend who first comes to mind and put something on the calendar today!

S’mores Nights—A Reason to Gather

Our 4th of July weekend was filled with s’mores, fires, and starry Vermont nights. (Confession: I’m not a big s’mores fan—unless they’re in ice cream form. But I can put away a perfectly toasted marshmallow…or a few.)

According to the New York Times Well newsletter, simply having a reason to gather—something regular and low-pressure—makes it far more likely to happen. So why not brand your own recurring hangout with friends? Maybe it’s Sangria Sundays to squash the Sunday scaries, or my personal favorite from the article: the "Half-Assed Potluck" (which I can absolutely get behind—no pun intended).

The key is to make it fit your life—kids or no kids, once a week or once a month, minimal prep or full-on event. If it’s stressful, it won’t stick. But when it’s simple and fun, it becomes something everyone looks forward to.

This Sunday, for us, is Family Paella Night—which works very well for me, because with my husband Ed’s Spanish roots taking over, I get the night off from cooking.

So text a few friends, pick a theme, and make it a thing. Connection doesn’t have to be complicated—especially on a Margarita Monday. (Check out the NYT Well for more ideas on this.)

Nature:  An AWE-some way to reduce stress

Over the 4th of July weekend, I woke up to the kind of peaceful mountain view that makes you inhale slowly to take it in—coffee in hand, soft morning light streaming through summer birch trees, mist settling on the the hills outside my brother-in-law’s cabin in Vermont. The air was cool and quiet, except for the steady chorus of birdsong drifting through the open window.

Curious to know who was behind this morning soundtrack, I opened my Merlin Bird ID app. Just as the sharp call of a blue jay cut through the air, the app confirmed its identity as the bird flew past me. This was awe, a phenomenon that leaves us with a sense of wonder that is hard to describe with words. 

I had the opportunity to talk about the power of awe on the Today Show this week.

The research behind awe is truly incredible. Psychologist Dacher Keltner of UC Berkeley has found that experiencing awe—even for just a few minutes a day—can lower inflammation in the body over time. And when inflammation drops, so do levels of cortisol (our stress hormone), along with symptoms of anxiety, depression, and even the risk of chronic illness.

A few minutes outside to breathe, catching a sunset or sunrise, or taking a walk by the ocean—these simple moments in nature never get old. That’s part of what defines an awe experience: it continues to offer wonder and renewal, unlike rewards that rely solely on dopamine and quickly fade.

Spiritual practices, witnessing acts of courage or kindness, moving together in sync (think dance or group exercise), and even music can also spark awe. The key is finding what speaks to you—and weaving it into your daily life. The easiest health hack you will find out there! 

I want to recommend Jackie's Newsletter: In the Saddle.

In the Saddle is weekly newsletter that is fun and full of science-based tips on wellness in midlife. It’s written by my friend Jackie Giannelli, a certified nurse practitioner and menopause expert. I look forward to reading it each week, and she is one of the few menopause voices I completely trust. Highly recommend!

This week, I fully experienced the truth that life can hold both sorrow and joy. While the Texas flood tragedy felt heavy in my heart, I also experienced moments of joy around me. It was a mix of emotions, often all at once: sadness, guilt, joy, gratitude. Here is a snapshot:

• my son getting his license

• the new Superman leaving him a message before the driving test because I couldn't be there

• watching my nephew discover fireworks for the first time

• the 4th with my girls

Please keep sharing your good things—big and small! Here are a few from readers this week: 

• Sofia: a nap with my dog, my sister’s show

• Senia: Fireflies, walk on the beach

• Maureen: Taking time to heal, reading a great book

Good to Know!

Wishing you every good thing this week.

Why 3 Good Things?

Wellness isn’t one big thing—it’s three good things, or two good things, or five. It’s noticing the gifts of the life we have.

If you’ve followed me for a while, you’ve probably heard me talk about “3 Good Things.” It’s the question I often ask my kids and one of my favorite gratitude practices.

Research shows that identifying three good things each day can actually rewire your brain from negativity to optimism in just 30 days. Follow along for my 3GT each week! And send me yours! I want to hear from you.